Hello, we are ShortStack

He’s been referred to as Jimmy, Jim-bo and Tasty-cakes but around here we know him as the head honcho, chief master, overlord, and CEO of this place we call work. Jim spends his day doing CEO stuff - whatever that is - and spends his nights un-friending annoying people on Facebook, and hanging out with his family. He’s obsessed with customer service and probably gives away way too much free stuff, but it’s not uncommon for a support ticket to be answered by Jim himself, just because he wants to. If he wasn’t an entrepreneur he would want to be a king size candy bar in a Halloween bag, you know the kind that is awesome when you find it but then it makes you sick because you ate too much. When we asked him how he felt about pancakes he was speechless, we think he’s still coming to terms with the fact that he’s made more pancakes than any man should ever have to.

Doug is our mystery lead developer. We say mystery because he’s so busy making ShortStack awesome that he didn’t have time to tell us about himself. But we swear he exists. What we do know is that Doug is almighty and all-knowing and that he is bothered by Adam far too often. When he’s not being by far the most productive employee we have, he’s at home spending time with his family and enjoying life. And, it should be noted, that Doug sports more ShortStack gear than anyone else in the office. That, added to his mad skills, makes it okay that he didn’t fill out his bio questionnaire.

Dylan is another one of those dev guys, which means we’re not sure what he does. But it’s good, otherwise we wouldn’t keep hiring people. Like most developers, Dylan doesn’t mind spending all of his off time on a computer. He’s one of the few people in the office who actually enjoys pancakes, minus the fact that they’re difficult to prepare. Dylan also has the best nicknames: Dyl-pickle and Twompdong. (We're too afraid to ask)

Lea spends her day in the office making cheddar as a result of her awesome graphic design skills. She’s been designing everything you could think of for the past 13 years, which has lead her to do anything not computer related outside of work. When she’s not working, hanging out with her mammals, or playing outside, you can find her screaming “pancakes for life” from various rooftops.

Chelsea has one of the most difficult jobs at ShortStack; observing our office antics then forming them into intellectual and intriguing blog posts. Luckily she’s a master with words and keeps us looking good on a daily basis. Her family calls her Shelly B. We have no idea why, but who are we to judge? All we know is she thinks pancakes are great for breakfast, lunch, and dinner and she’s a twin, so if we ever need a quick replacement we know where to find one.

Adam could sell a car to a car salesman, if you know what we mean. He spends his days in the office talking to the world about how awesome ShortStack is, booking new clients, and working towards being a professional Nerf Gun slinger. When he’s not shooting at Ben Mach, he’s contemplating ruling the world while sitting on the couch with his wife. He prefers bacon in the morning over pancakes but we choose to let him stay at ShortStack because he still finds pancakes delicious.

We know Ben is a wordsmith because he openly admits that he’s a sucker for the correct usage of “you’re.” When he’s not in the office creating perfectly worded content about ShortStack and our expert knowledge of Facebook, he’s waiting (read: hoping) for a spontaneous hockey game to break out. He claims his best quality is his bedroom eyes, which we want nothing to do with, so we just tell ourselves that his best quality is the fact that he truly believes that griddle-cooked buttermilk delights are the greatest breakfast food ever. We’re anxiously awaiting his autobiography titled “Adventures in Writer’s Block,” which Ben foresees as being pretty short. If he ever finishes it.

Ben is a developer, which means he says stuff nobody understands and does stuff nobody understands but no one cares because without the developers, ShortStack would just be a pile of pancake batter. He has a BS in CS and he’s been rocking the inter-web since 1893, he’s just that good. Unlike the rest of us traditional breakfast eaters, Ben likes to get fancy with the first meal of his day and eat crepes and beignets. He spends his days in the office coding and harassing Jim and likes life with a side of hot sauce and ranch.

Sara’s the only girl in the office who will jump in every Nerf Gun war and down a bag of dirty chips a day. She’s not afraid to call up a national media contact and tell them to talk about ShortStack or force Jim to do the CEO duties he really doesn’t want to do. She only likes pancakes with chocolate chip smiley faces on them, and eats bacon way more often than a Jewish person should. Often referred to as the crazy cat lady, Sara is one of those freaky animal lovers, you know, the kind that blog about their cats, but since she only has two we haven’t turned her in yet.

If you’re thinking this is just Jim in a wig, you’re wrong. Amy is, however, the Overlord’s one and only favorite big sister and ShortStack’s top-dog customer support representative. When she’s not providing exceptional customer service, she’s hanging out with her family or hiding away in her cabin in the forest. She looked like a scared child to tell us pancakes aren’t her favorite breakfast food, but as to not upset her little brother she did eat the handlebars on a moped pancake Jim once made for her.

Dana joined ShortStack after getting tired of living the lonely life of a freelance writer. She now spends her days writing awesome social media content and getting it placed all over the world wide web. Her academic accomplishments are longer than any other employee’s, so we won’t mention them here out of fear of embarrassing everyone else. Let’s just say she has experience. Dana’s nickname is Sully (from her maiden name, not Monsters Inc.), and her free time is consumed by her family and pets. She didn’t want Jim to know she prefers waffles over pancakes, but her knowledge of Facebook, like the fact that she’s blocked the tagging feature, guarantees her job.

If we could give people more ridiculous titles than they already have, Jane would be “Office Mom.” Without Jane, it’s likely more days than not would result in Nerf Gun wars, toy helicopter flying, and inflatable shark dodging. However, Jane keeps us working towards our goals, carrying out marketing strategies, and leading internal initiatives. Outside of ShortStack Jane can be found enjoying life; hiking in the mountains, traveling around the world, and visiting vineyards and breweries.

Opal is our resident office dog and best friend to Lea. She spends her days guarding the back corner of the office and avoiding loud noises, most people and nerf gun wars. She enjoys hiking in the mountains, rolling in the snow and going on walks and fears ceiling fans, feet, and shadows. We can assume her favorite breakfast food is muffins because she once ate an entire tray of Lea’s birthday cupcakes and her memoir would probably be “Yes, I’m a Rescue Dog”